To begin, I have always been a spiritual person. I was raised Catholic. In middle school, a friend invited me to a Baptist youth group meeting. I was intrigued to learn all about that faith as well as others.
As I got older, my views changed on how I felt about religion. I wanted the flexibility of my own spirituality. I just had to figure out what that looked like. I have always believed in the old adages “everything happens for a reason”, “there is a plan”, and “our loved ones are still with us”.
I have also always been creative. Paper crafting, photography, Art of any kind. I always knew that it would be a dream to be an Artist one day. See my bio if you want more information on my Art journey 🙂
In 2017, after leaving my part-time corporate position and decided I wanted to be a full-time artist, hoping to gain some clarity on why I was so restless. I learned everything I could about everything I thought I needed and wanted. BUT I wasn’t sure what I wanted, where I wanted to go or what I wanted to do.
I didn’t want my love of art to become a job that I no longer wanted to do, that I was sure of. Everything else was a little blurry. So, I created lots of videos and lots of posts, then I started scaling back when I went back to work in 2018.
In 2019, I changed jobs again to what I thought would be a less stressful, “easy” job. I started out low-key, doing the very minimum required, and less than I knew how to do, but again, “easy” job! Unfortunately, that is not who I am, and I continued to find ways to improve upon the things I could control, which morphed into not “easy” but I was good at it.
I was still restless! I was still looking for something but not sure what. I was thinking there has to be something that will make me feel fulfilled. I put it out of my mind.
I have been doing a lot of learning with my art and who I am there, in my family life, spiritual life (including forgiveness and my overall mental health) and everywhere. I am reading, watching and listening to healthier content, trying to quiet the voice in my head and say nicer things to myself and others. I am trying to be a better person for everyone in my life. I am trying to be present and intentional.
I have been throwing out my intentions into the universe and asking it to show me the way, I know how that sounds. I have been asking for signs. I have been seeing them everywhere, but subtly.
From thinking about the Coos County Nursing Home, every time I go by and wonder what life is like inside. Do they get visitors? I wonder if there is something I can do to brighten their day, maybe by teaching them to paint to even just to play with paint. It’s a passing but repetitive thought.
Often I think I should go by and drop off those cards on the shelf for them to use to send to people they love, but I get overwhelmed by the process and again set it aside.
Multiple ideas have come and gone all generally centered around the same idea.
Then there was an AHA moment. It started while I was driving home, reflecting on the most recent Thanksgiving holiday, feeling all the feels. I asked the universe again, if there is something I need to do with all of these ideas swirling in my head, show me a sign! Of course, this was done driving through Franconia Notch in NH, screaming at the top of my lungs in my true bull in a china shop fashion! Well, that did it!
Here is how I know:
On my way home, I stopped to get the mail and there was a Christmas Card – first of the year, my favorite. I saw the writing on the front but not who it was from. I placed the mail in the car and proceeded home to empty the car and settle in. After cleaning up, I went through the mail. I saw the card and upon turning it over almost fell over. The card was from one of my oldest friends, Tammy. I almost fell on the floor because Tammy was the first sign. I knew immediately.
Let me explain. Tammy is the kindest person I know. She helps people, she supports everyone with kindness and love. She is the epitome of light. As soon as I saw her name I knew. Whenever I see any loving, uplifting stories, it is usually Tammy. Tammy has (or had) a mailbox setup for all the kids to write their letters to Santa and drop them into the mailbox. She then took the letters to Macy’s for the Make A Wish letter drive. This is why she was the sign!
I promptly sent her a PM on Facebook that I needed to speak to her about an idea I had. I said that I got her card and I have a story if she wanted to hear it. She was intrigued. I told her (abbreviated version of this story) that I needed her help. Why? I wasn’t sure, just that if I needed to do something charitable to give back to be fulfilled, she would be the best person to talk to. Maybe just someone to listen and understand the need and encourage instead of judge. A safe person to talk to about something I am not sure is crazy or not. Maybe because it was fate. Maybe now I have all the tools I need to make this successful? Maybe this was meant to be!
I wanted to somehow incorporate my art and all of the work I have (and need to give away to make room for more). The problem is, I don’t want to sign all of those cards myself lol. After brainstorming (for like a second, she’s just like me) her bull met my bull and here I am!
Second & Third sign, Tammy had 2 Facebook memories on the day I called her. One was from the Nashua Stroll several years back where I saw her son perform. The second was from the last time I saw her which was at the funeral of a teacher from High School who would have loved the ideas we were discussing.
With Tammy’s light and encouragement I decided to embark on what I feel like it going to be a HUGE, exciting scary…fill in the blank moment! Not sure what’s going to happen but I am so grateful that you showed up even just to read my ramblings.
I continue to see more signs as I wrap this post up which reassures me that I am indeed on the right path! I hope you will send me your One Card and make all the difference in someone’s life today! Thank you from the bottom of my heart!!
